Chapter 35
“This is fine as it is,” Xi Qin thought Jiang Zhong didn’t believe him, so he reassured him again, “I really won’t say anything like that again.”
“Then you won’t think about it anymore, will you?” Jiang Zhong gave him a sideways glance.
Xi Qin: “…”
This was beyond his control.
“Tell me,” Jiang Zhong persisted, “What can I do to make you feel at ease? Today is your birthday, and I’ll give you whatever you want.”
“Really?” Xi Qin asked ambiguously.
Jiang Zhong swallowed and said, as if letting it all go, “Really, as long as it’s something I can do.”
“Then…” Xi Qin dragged out the words, “From now on, say ‘I like you’ to me once every day.”
“…” Jiang Zhong hesitated, “Is that all?”
“That’s all,” Xi Qin suppressed a laugh, “Or do you want me to…?”
“I don’t,” Jiang Zhong immediately denied it, “I didn’t think of anything. You said it, so I agree. I’ll even throw in one more for you.”
“Alright.” Xi Qin finally finished cleaning the dishes, wiped his hands on the towel, and turned around to hug Jiang Zhong from the front, “Baby, you’re so good. I don’t care, I can’t leave you now. You have to take responsibility for me.”
“Alright, alright, I’ll take responsibility,” Jiang Zhong tucked his fingers into Xi Qin’s hair, “Should I take you to meet the parents, little wife?”
“You’re the little wife,” Xi Qin buried his face in Jiang Zhong’s neck and whispered, “But, at most, I can only take you to meet my dad.”
“Why?” Jiang Zhong didn’t think much of it at first.
Xi Qin was silent for a while before lowering his voice further, “Because my mom passed away.”
Jiang Zhong’s fingers, which were running through his hair, froze for a moment, and he opened his mouth but didn’t say anything.
“It was when I was in high school,” Xi Qin added.
Jiang Zhong remembered what Peng Siyuan had said about Xi Qin taking a year off from high school, and he thought that might be the reason.
“Was it an accident?” Jiang Zhong tightened his hold around Xi Qin.
“No,” Xi Qin spoke with difficulty, “It was suicide.”
Jiang Zhong was a bit shocked, unsure of what to say at that moment.
“Are you shocked?” Xi Qin could tell from Jiang Zhong’s expression, “I never dared to tell you before.”
“It’s okay,” Jiang Zhong repeated, “It’s okay, it’s all in the past. Your mom must be doing well in another world.”
“Mm,” Xi Qin said, “Actually, after thinking about it, for my mom, maybe it was a kind of release.”
Xi Qin’s mother had a car accident when Xi Qin was in middle school, resulting in the amputation of both her legs below the thigh.
When Xi Qin’s mom woke up in the hospital and realized she had lost both of her legs, she cried herself unconscious. Though later she had prosthetics and could live normally, she still couldn’t accept it.
Every time she encountered the inconvenience caused by the prosthetics, she would become very irritable, almost wishing she could tear them off.
The mounting inconveniences, combined with the loss of her career because of her amputations, eventually led to her being unable to bear it. During Xi Qin’s first summer break of high school, she ended her life.
“So you took a year off from school?”
“Mm?” Xi Qin looked at Jiang Zhong in surprise. “How did you know I took a year off?”
“Peng Siyuan told me this morning,” Jiang Zhong explained. “He mentioned he’s already in his third year, and I found it odd that he’s in a higher grade but calls you ‘bro’. Then I found out from him that you took a year off and ended up in the same grade as me.”
“Yeah,” Xi Qin forced a smile, “Otherwise, you’d have to call me ‘senior’.”
“No wonder when I checked your ID and saw you’re a lot older than me,” Jiang Zhong added, “I thought you started school later.”
“A lot older?” Xi Qin felt a bit slighted.
“I just turned 19 recently, and you’re celebrating your 21st birthday today. Isn’t that quite a gap?” Jiang Zhong answered himself, “Although, I guess it’s not that big.”
“Not much of a gap at all,” Xi Qin said domineeringly, “You’re not allowed to dislike me.”
“Alright, alright,” Jiang Zhong coaxed him, “I won’t dislike you.”
Perhaps it was the mention of his mother, who had passed away a few years ago, that made Xi Qin’s mood quite low for the rest of the afternoon. Though he was still interacting with Jiang Zhong as usual, without any awkward silences, he wasn’t joking around or teasing Jiang Zhong every few words like before.
Jiang Zhong felt a bit unaccustomed to this “normal” Xi Qin and thought about how to bring his mood back up.
It was probably his mention of parents that triggered Xi Qin’s sad memories.
“We’ve been walking around here for a while,” Xi Qin pushed the shopping cart next to Jiang Zhong, “Have you decided what you want to eat?”
“Mm.” Jiang Zhong had been thinking about something else and hadn’t even considered what to eat.
“Well, we’ll wait until you decide,” Xi Qin stopped, resting both hands on the cart handle. “Your choice paralysis really can’t be cured.”
Jiang Zhong thought to himself: You know I have decision-making problems, and yet you’re making me choose? Isn’t that just torturing me?
“Let’s get this,” Jiang Zhong randomly pointed to the nearby freezer, “Steak, can you cook it?”
“I’ve never cooked it before,” Xi Qin opened the freezer door, took out a piece of individually packaged steak, and looked at it. “I’ll follow a tutorial when we get back, but I can’t promise it’ll taste great.”
“It’s fine,” Jiang Zhong said decisively, “I’m not picky, as long as it’s edible.”
“Okay, which brand is better?”
“Whatever,” Jiang Zhong said lazily, “It’s all the same. Just grab any one.”
Xi Qin nodded and picked up two steaks. “This won’t be enough, you should get…”
“Don’t ask me,” Jiang Zhong interrupted, “Just handle it however you want. Whatever you cook, I’ll eat.”
Xi Qin chuckled for a while, then bought the groceries as he planned. Afterward, they both went through the snack aisle, and the shopping cart was packed full.
“I also need to get you a toothbrush. The one you had hasn’t been used for a long time…” Xi Qin said, then realized something important, “By the way, are you going home tonight?”
“I’m not going back,” Jiang Zhong said naturally, “I already told my mom yesterday, I’m not coming home tonight because a classmate’s birthday.”
“Classmate?” Xi Qin glanced at Jiang Zhong.
“Well, what else?” Jiang Zhong asked back, “Should I tell my mom, ‘Ah, today is your son’s boyfriend’s birthday, so your son’s staying with him tonight’?”
“Well, that wouldn’t be impossible,” Xi Qin laughed.
“Go away,” Jiang Zhong gave a small eye roll, “If that’s the case, you probably won’t see me tonight.”
Jiang Zhong wasn’t sure how other couples felt when talking about “tonight,” but after saying “I’m not coming home tonight,” some unhealthy thoughts popped into his mind.
Although he and Xi Qin had lived together for nearly half a month recently, sharing a bed every night, they had remained innocent, with only a few handshakes exchanged.
Today, Jiang Zhong felt a bit restless.
His mom had told him that once the relationship reached a certain level, certain things could be done to further deepen the bond.
It was hard to define what that “level” was, but Jiang Zhong felt that his relationship with Xi Qin was already quite deep.
And today was Xi Qin’s birthday, which also influenced his mood.
Maybe he could use it to cheer Xi Qin up?
Jiang Zhong’s gaze kept drifting to the packaging on the counter that had words like “ultra-thin,” “vibrant,” and other specialized terms printed on it.
“What are you looking at?” Xi Qin’s voice, full of amusement, rang in his ears.
“Huh?” Jiang Zhong almost jumped in surprise, “Nothing, I’ll just grab a box of mint candies.”
Jiang Zhong already felt guilty, and after Xi Qin caught him, he didn’t dare look around anymore. He focused intently on the shopping cart.
Xi Qin smiled and, from the top shelf of the rack, picked up a box of mint candies and placed it on the counter to check out.
Jiang Zhong thought to himself, this can’t be blamed on me, Xi Qin missed the perfect opportunity tonight.
But Jiang Zhong still felt a little regretful and thought he was being cowardly.
Since the supermarket had placed that thing in such a prominent spot, wasn’t the intention obvious?
The cashier must have long since gotten used to people buying that kind of thing, the more hesitant and sneaky someone like him seemed, the more “creepy” it made him appear.
Damn, Jiang Zhong cursed inwardly. He couldn’t believe he was having a “creepy” moment. He had been the “campus star” in high school.
He should have acted like he had plenty of experience back then and just thrown two boxes on the counter without a second thought.
As long as he wasn’t embarrassed, it would be the others who would feel awkward—especially Xi Qin.
Ah, so annoying. He just wanted to go back to the checkout moment and go through the process again.
“Jiang Zhong?” Xi Qin raised his voice a little.
“Hmm?” Jiang Zhong furrowed his brow and looked at him.
“What are you thinking about?” Xi Qin asked, puzzled. “I’ve called your name several times.”
“Did you mock me earlier?” Jiang Zhong stared at Xi Qin.
“Huh?” Xi Qin was even more confused. “I didn’t, when?”
Jiang Zhong mumbled, “When we were checking out at the supermarket.”
“Ha,” Xi Qin couldn’t hold back his laughter. “You mean that? I didn’t mock you, I just thought you looked so cute—wanting to look but too shy to do so.”
Jiang Zhong snorted, “You mocked me. Why did you call me then?”
“I really didn’t,” Xi Qin defended himself, continuing to handle the marinated meat. “Do you want your steak cooked more or less?”
“More cooked.”
“Okay.”
Xi Qin then started preparing the steak. Jiang Zhong checked his phone for a while, then glanced at Xi Qin to make sure he wouldn’t see what was on the screen.
“Well, you can stay at home and get things ready,” Jiang Zhong said after putting his phone away. “The cake should be almost ready. I’ll go downstairs to pick it up.”
“Okay,” Xi Qin responded.
Jiang Zhong first went to the kitchen and exchanged a brief “goodbye kiss” with Xi Qin before heading to the entrance to change his shoes and put on his coat.
“Where are your disposable masks?” Jiang Zhong asked before leaving. “Give me one.”
“They’re in the storage box on the shoe rack.”
Jiang Zhong took a mask from the box Xi Qin mentioned, feeling a little guilty as he explained, “It’s really cold outside, so I’ll wear a mask to block the wind.”
When they returned from the supermarket, they ordered a birthday cake from a shop downstairs. But instead of going directly to the cake shop, Jiang Zhong headed toward a pharmacy.
As he walked, Jiang Zhong kept mentally preparing himself.
He was already an adult man, so buying a set at the pharmacy was completely normal—it was for health reasons, nothing to be embarrassed about. He just had to avoid looking “creepy” and act decisively…
Damn, he wasn’t going to use it, so why should he be the one to buy it? It made it seem like he was really looking forward to it. Whoever needs it should buy it.
Jiang Zhong struggled inwardly, and just as he was about to turn back, the pharmacy had already come into view.
Fine, Jiang Zhong adjusted his mask and thought, he was already here…
“I’m back,” Jiang Zhong called out as he entered.
“Okay,” Xi Qin replied, busy with something in his hands. “Dinner will be ready soon.”
“Mm.”
Jiang Zhong placed Xi Qin’s keys and the cake on the counter, then checked his coat pockets to make sure nothing had fallen out during the walk. After confirming, he relaxed and took off his coat and changed his shoes.
After putting the cake in the fridge, Jiang Zhong went to the kitchen and exchanged a brief “welcome kiss” with Xi Qin.
Xi Qin’s first attempt at frying steak looked and tasted pretty good.
But Jiang Zhong was a bit distracted, his mind drifting back to the coat pocket in the entrance, where the “tools” were.
“Isn’t it good?”
“It’s good,” Jiang Zhong took a big bite of steak. “It’s really good.”
By the time they finished dinner, it had already gotten completely dark outside.
The closer it got to night, the more nervous Jiang Zhong became, and his facial expression couldn’t hide it anymore.
“Baby,” Xi Qin pinched Jiang Zhong’s hand, which was nervously tapping his cup. “What’s wrong? You’ve been acting weird all night.”
“No, no,” Jiang Zhong took a sip of water. “What’s weird?”
“Everything’s weird,” Xi Qin said. “You’re even stuttering now.”
“Should we eat the cake now?” Jiang Zhong stiffly tried to change the subject.
“Now that’s even weirder,” Xi Qin stared at Jiang Zhong, trying to read his expression. “Come on, admit it. Have you been hiding something from me?”
“Of course not,” Jiang Zhong immediately retorted. “I’m too full to eat the cake now, let’s eat it later.”
Xi Qin nodded. “Alright.”
“I’ll go shower first,” Jiang Zhong stood up. “Where’s the couple pajamas we bought in J City? I want to wear them.”
Xi Qin went upstairs and brought down his pajamas.
Without saying a word, Jiang Zhong took the pajamas and went straight into the bathroom, locking the bathroom door behind him.
A bit embarrassed, how should he bring this up?
Xi Qin was really something—he was so proactive before, but now he didn’t say anything. Jiang Zhong didn’t have the chance to tell him what he was thinking.
Jiang Zhong, feeling troubled, slowly finished his shower. Just as he opened the door, Xi Qin grabbed him, pinned him against the wall, and kissed him deeply.
“I get it now,” Xi Qin whispered. “So you’ve been avoiding me.”
“Huh?” Jiang Zhong was dazed by the kiss and didn’t immediately react.
“After a few days apart, you’ve become like you were at the beginning again,” Xi Qin said. “Are you afraid I’ll do something to you?”
Jiang Zhong: “…”
Not really.
“We were so close when we were out before,” Xi Qin continued. “Why don’t you want it now?”
Jiang Zhong: “…I don’t.”
“Then why are you avoiding me?” Xi Qin said, sounding aggrieved. “Little jerk.”
For the first time, Jiang Zhong thought the phrase “little jerk” sounded so sweet, familiar Xi Qin had come back.
“Pfft, hahaha—” Jiang Zhong couldn’t help but laugh for a long time.
Xi Qin: “…”
Xi Qin looked confused, almost softened by Jiang Zhong’s laughter. “What are you laughing at?”
“Nothing,” Jiang Zhong took a breath. “Just thinking how silly my boyfriend is, and the key thing is, he thinks he’s so clever.”
“Really?” Xi Qin squinted his eyes, wiped his hand through Jiang Zhong’s damp hair. “You go dry your hair first. When I’m done with my shower, I’ll talk to you.”
After Xi Qin entered the bathroom, Jiang Zhong leaned against the wall for two more minutes. Then, he rummaged through the bag full of snacks and pulled out the mint candy, popping two into his mouth.
“Didn’t expect these candies would come in handy after all,” Jiang Zhong muttered.
Instead of following Xi Qin’s suggestion and drying his hair, Jiang Zhong took his time walking to the entrance, pulling the item from his coat pocket.
The pajamas didn’t have pockets, so Jiang Zhong had to hold it in his hand. After taking a deep breath, he returned to the bathroom door and leaned against the wall, waiting for Xi Qin to come out.
Jiang Zhong rehearsed what he would say in his mind. Every time he practiced, he ended up scrapping it—it was just too… hard for him to say.
When the water stopped in the bathroom, Jiang Zhong still hadn’t figured out what to say. Fine, he’d just improvise.
Xi Qin came out of the bathroom, wiping his hair, and looked at Jiang Zhong in confusion. “Why are you still here?”
Jiang Zhong hid his hand holding the item behind his back and swallowed nervously. “I still have one more birthday gift to give you.”
“What is it?” Xi Qin smiled.
“This,” Jiang Zhong handed the item to Xi Qin, his face flushing. “I don’t know if you’ll like it.”
Xi Qin immediately recognized what Jiang Zhong was holding. After understanding what Jiang Zhong meant, his chest rose and fell slightly, his voice deepening. “You…”
“You’re mistaken,” Jiang Zhong said. “I’m not unwilling.”